This is Carmelo the maintenance man replacing the nasty hole in my countertop
and this is the bug-infested hole pre-Carmelo
I
would like to introduce you to some people...first on the left we have Maria Cristina who exports the nanduti weaving you see her displaying to harpists in Japan. She is holding a tablecloth she and her mother (on the left of the photo) made for a woman that then decided not to buy it... The lace work is incredibly delicate and takes lots of long hours, careful attention,and skillful hands to make.
This is Cristina, Carmelo's wife who is preparing my nanduti frame...story to follow.
This is my room and living room now that I have some furniture! Note the attempt to deal with the pink paint by buying pink furniture... sigh of resignation.
This is the token statue of San Bernardino...I just had to get a picture before I left...
Below is the hotel I stayed at that has connections with Paraguay Hecho a Mano. It was a huge historical draw but the family that owned it let it fall into disrepair and only last year they restored the place and have made it into a great (and expensive) hotel. During the summer months, the town is chalk full of rich Paraguayans passing the summer months at the lakeside but right now, the town is dead... This is the couple from California that spent 2 weeks here and just recently head back. We made fast friends as I worked as a fill-in translator when I was around. They invested in the hotel and are looking to buy a home in San Ber to retire there.
This is a typical paved Paraguayan road. Note that I said paved...most are just dirt and the first upgrade is to rocks like in this road and eventually if asphalt if it becomes a major thoroughfare.
Hey all I hope all is going well in the incoming winter freeze…
Paraguay is disgustingly hot and they tell me that it is only going to get worse…I try not to think about it. I now have a borrowed fan in my room but I’m resigning myself to the investment of air conditioning… Half of me thinks that I will be better with just fans because as it is I am getting a lot better accustomed to the climate and having air conditioning will just make it all the more miserable as soon as I step outside…but as the natives continually describe the summer as “an oven” I don’t know how much I’ll want to be inside either.
Speaking of inside, my apartment is a lot more comfortable. I bought a living room set with a couch and two matching chairs for $120 (and then invested in some funny throw pillows to accompany the industrial strength couch set), a beautiful full-sized wardrobe with plenty of space to fit the entire contents of my suitcase and then some, a gas stove and kitchen stuff, and then friends lent me a big bed. I still need a fridge and a kitchen table, but I’m feeling like I actually have a livable space. I got some great posters from the Church distribution center next to the temple in Asuncion so I even have a few wall decorations J
In my last blog, I posted a picture with the mom and youngest daughter of the Rodriguez family—I should talk a little more about them because they have really made my stay in Itauguá possible. I met the oldest daughter, Sinthia because she is the sub-manager in the Employment Resources Center in Asuncion. Having taught in Buenos Aires has been an incredible blessing and I am constantly amazed at how the Lord coordinates things for me in ways that I could never coordinate myself. Anyway, I went to the office to meet the manager and in meeting her, met Sinthia (this is one of only 2 centers in the entire world that has women for managers…more on women running Paraguay later). Her family lives in a government-sponsored neighborhood in the outskirts of Itauguá and she offered her brother to help me find a place to live. I ended up walking to the family’s house with another member that I met at General Conference and her mom fell in love with me. I still don’t know what I did that was so touching or extraordinary but she told me that I was an angel and started telling all her friends about this amazing American that had come down to study ñandutí. She lent me a bed her brother made which is beautifully comfortable and bigger than any bed I’ve ever had in my life outside of a hotel room! Her 20 year old son did, in fact, help me a TON in getting my apartment, taking me to get furniture, and setting up the bed. Were he to be a returned-missionary and in some assemblance for dating I would really be in trouble because I would love to be adopted into their family. But, at it is, he’s pretty confused about life in general and about himself in particular. 2 months ago, his girlfriend was killed on her moto waiting to make a left-hand turn when a speeding bus clipped her. David (the son) ended up being nearby and heard about an accident, only to walk out and see her in a mangled mess on the pavement. Subsequently, he’s gone into a depression wondering if all the talk about an eternal life and whatnot is real or not. He’s decided that he doesn’t want to study anymore, he is angry at his dad (though with good reason) for stuff going on within the family business, and otherwise just doesn’t know where he is or who he is yet. It makes me really sad because he is really intelligent and has a lot of potential if he could take things into perspective and let the Lord heal his heart. His mom and Sinthia are confident that I can help in that because for whatever reason he trusts me and talks with me, but I can’t be everyone’s angel and he’ll have to make those decisions to come unto the Lord by himself.
Meanwhile, I’ve made best friends with the maintenance guy and subsequently with his family. He isn’t very educated but incredibly sweet and has jumped to help me with any task I have to throw at him. I had asked for his help when I discovered the cockroaches jumping out of a hole in my countertop (which the owner insists a carpenter will come and fix but hasn’t materialized yet) and he ended up helping me jimmy-rig a mosquito net over my bedroom window, put up the shower rod, set up my oven gas tank, and he was the one responsible for the paint job (well the owner told him the color and he painted). When he asked what I was doing in Paraguay and I told him I was studying ñandutí, he told me his wife weaves and she would be happy to teach me. So, this last Tuesday I went with him to his house… it was a humbling experience. They have a one room, brick house in the middle of nowhere, Paraguay. We took a bus about 4 kilometers down the highway and then walked for 20 minutes down dirt roads to his house. His little 4 year old was busy taking a spatula to the red clay of the open patio and his wife showed me the weaving she was working on. Her name is Cristina just like me and as it turns out his daughter suffered from trauma at birth and her right arm is just like my left! I was shocked as he started telling me the story about her birth and apparently she had her umbilical cord wrapped around her neck and the doctors took her by forceps and ended up breaking her collar bone and stretching out her arm and now she has a metal plate in there, it is shorter than her left but not by much, and she can’t raise it above her shoulder. Now that I am aware of it, I can see the difference but I hadn’t thought anything before. It was such an interesting situation bringing me into a younger mirror of myself. She is 11 years old and noticeably self-conscious about her arm. It’s a real blessing to have “coincidences” like this and I hope to work to help her build her confidence and show her that she isn’t broken or inferior for her disability.
I went back the next day after meeting her cousin who is involved in selling ñandutí to Japanese investors (pictures explained later) and had my first official lesson. We talked about Monica (the 11 year old) and how they had sold everything they had to pay for her operations and have yet to recover from that sacrifice. The 4 year old is a handful and loves to get terribly dirty and Cristina is expecting another baby in a couple of months. She refused to let me pay for the lesson.
I am learning that my timeline of just studying Guaraní and then jumping into the ñandutí is not going to work. I had originally planned to take a good couple of months to just study Guaraní and get familiarized with my surroundings, get settled, etc (including time to finish stuff from Guatemala that I have still in-progress). Then, I wanted to learn how to weave ñandutí in order to make contacts with everyone that is working in the trade here in Itauguá before actually doing formal research and interviews and whatnot. But, as I look for help from the people that I am meeting, everyone wants me to meet this vendor or that one, telling me that I’ll learn Guaraní no problem and that it’s so fantastic that I want to learn about ñandutí because it is a dying art and the youth don’t care about it anymore and they want people to appreciate it and document thigns before it disappears. Basically everyone I have met is completely bilingual in Spanish and Guaraní and even the old people speak enough to have political conversations—a very different linguistic atmosphere than I was used to in Guatemala. Granted, I am still in the urban stretch and many would like to consider Itauguá a suburb of Asuncion (but it’s not…it developed very independently of Asuncion and the urban sprawl spreading toward Itauguá has just made it look like a suburbia of the city). But, as people are incredibly open and inquisitive, when they ask me what I am doing here, I tell them that I have come to do a study on ñandutí and EVERYONE knows someone that I need to meet and I have been shocked by the incredible warmth of the Paraguayan reception but it also pushes me more directly into research mode faster than I had anticipated. Everyone is SHOCKED that I speak good Spanish and I’ve heard everything from people thinking I am a Peace Corps volunteer, missionary (within the Mormon crowd), to Brazilian and German. Since I speak good Spanish, then, they are excited to accompany me in getting my research underway and help out in any way I see them being useful. I just had a 2 hour conversation in my doorway last night with my next door neighbor all about ñanduí and
Coming to Itauguá to study Guaraní doesn’t make any more sense to the people than living by myself. I could have lived with a family but I’m grateful to have my own place where people can come and visit me and I can take my own time with my music and my weaving and chill. And, while sometimes it’s really intimidating to think that I am all by myself in this sweltering country, it is a great blessing too. People are a lot more receptive I think in seeing that I am here by myself and that I really need their help to get anything done. Then, seeing that despite being on my own that I am confident and fun to talk to, they get more interested in me and my project and everyone kind of takes a piece of my project to own and tries to contribute. I’ve gotten really good at the “I’m not looking for a boyfriend and besides what would my mother say if I came back married?” speech. Somehow, personal conviction doesn’t mean a lot in rejecting dating propositions, but the mother-child bond is sacred here. The amount of single mothers is astounding and men are infamously transitory here but everyone adores his or her mother and ask me about how my mom feels about me being here. For those of you familiar with Paraguayan history, you will know that it has long been a country dominated by women. Due to multiple extended and bloody wars, the male population was decimated and there are estimates as high as 10 women to every man. While that statistic isn’t nearly as drastic anymore—it’s probably more like 2 or maybe 3 to 1 now, the culture still maintains a lot of the consequences of that situation. Boys are spoiled and allowed to roam around and often do, impregnating those whom he will along the path. Young mothers with children from multiple fathers is completely common, women are often the primary breadwinners even within monogamous relationships and the guys are just ”caigues” or lazy. Despite all of that, everyone is confident that I’ve got plenty of time to find a Paraguayan husband and that I’m going to want to hunker down in Itauguá. So, I’ve learned to call upon the absence of my mother to establish my temporary presence here…
Anyway, things are going well. The weaving is really delicate and complicated but the women have a lot of patience with me. The atmosphere living in an urban center is a lot different than rural Guatemala and I’m definitely feeling the stresses of culture shock. I’m working to get used to the Paraguayan accent, the constant presence of horny teenage boys staring at me walking around, the oppressive heat and subsequent lack of modestly dressed people, the constant fear of the water people offer me (though to this point I’ve drunk dozens of glasses of tap water and so far so good), the speeding buses and lack of personal transportation (though I plan to buy a bike soon) and the general sense of overwhelmingness in tackling a new culture, new language, new climate, and new relationships.
Overall, though, things are coming together. I would love to have some snow right about now, but I’ll settle for some cheap popsicles and some oh-so-yummy chipas (cheesebread they sell all over the country). Keep in touch, talk soon,
Cristina
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